Societies worldwide are challenged by heated debates around important societal topics like migration policies, gender equality, transgender rights, and climate change. These debates are perceived as highly polarized thereby increasing intolerance toward opposing opinions. Previous research has shown that respecting “disapproved others” as equals might foster tolerance, even in polarized contexts. Yet, an empirical test to establish whether the relationship link between respect and tolerance toward opposing others is still observable in the case of extreme opinions, strong disapproval of opposing opinions, and even strong perceived threats from opposing others, is still missing. In our research, we will test whether the strength of the association between personal respect norms and the tolerance of opposing opinions depends on the extremity of one’s own opinion, the strength of disapproval of the opposing opinion, and the perceived threat from the out‐group. Results based on survey data from more than 12,000 respondents from 12 European countries reveal that the association between personal respect norms and tolerance is unaffected by extremity, strength of disapproval, and perceived threat. The pattern of results is replicated with few exceptions across all 12 countries and six different controversial social topics. This is held in most cases even when considering differences in political views. We discuss the implications of our findings, their robustness, and the potential limits of the respect–tolerance link.